From Fake CFB Reference
Jump to: navigation, search

Hell Yeah! is a running back for the University of North Texas Mean Green fake college football team. He was born sometime in 1996 to parents who wish to remain anonymous. There is not much known about where he came from, only legends and myths that seem too absurd to be true. The following excerpts are a mixture of what we know and what may just be pure bs.

Early Life[edit | edit source]

Not a single person witnessed the birth of Yeah!. He was sent to Gregory Flam's "School for people who can't football good and want to learn how to do other stuff good too" also just known as "Football School." Hell's parents sent him to Kenya where the school was located at age 5 and didn't come back until his 15th birthday. But when his parents arrived at the school's location, the facilities had vanished and Hell Yeah! was standing there with bags packed. When asked about Flam, Hell is being quoted as saying "Who is Gregory Flam?"

High School Football[edit | edit source]

Hell enrolled at Denton High School after returning from Kenya. His parents were concerned about his education after abandoning him seemingly in the middle of nowhere in Kenya, but his IQ score was high enough to make Donald Trump blush. He spoke fluently in 23 different languages and was able to accurately recite Einstein's Theory of Relativity to the word. He walked-on to the high school football team and broke all of the schools rushing records... in one single game. He would break the single season rushing record for the state of Texas in his senior year. He became a 4-star running back with offers from almost all FBS level NFCAA schools.

Recruitment[edit | edit source]

As stated above, Yeah! was a highly touted recruit. As such, there is some controversy as to how North Texas was able to land such a star studded talent. It is rumored that Head Coach Johnny B. Goode paid for Hell's milkshake at a McDonald's one time, which charged to the University for $1.72. After a thorough 9 month investigation by the NFCAA, the charges were ultimately dropped. It was also reported that, at one of Hell's last games in which he scored a touchdown, Coach Goode was seen clapping exactly 4 times, clearly showing his hand in why he decided to attend a high school game. The University was never formally charged.

College Career[edit | edit source]

Hell Yeah! earned the starting role of running back in his senior season. Before this year he had seen some fake playing time, racking up 116 yards on 41 carries with 0 touchdowns in the 3 years he's been with UNT.