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The Notre Dame Fighting Irish are a struggling independent football team in the National Fake College Athletic Association.

Head Coach[edit]

Notre Dame's first game began in February of 2018. The opponent was the Michigan Wolverines, the setting was South Bend, Indiana. The Big 88 was coaching the Irish and was excited about the opportunity to beat the Wolverines in the season opener. However The Big 88 suddenly resigned from the head coaching job and disappeared from the stadium, never to be heard from again. The fans and players stood in stunned silence as the refs scrambled around. Several phone calls to the commissioner and moderators later, two coordinators were hired to take over for Notre Dame. Jackie Noffard and ThatCanDoSpirit strode the length of the sideline, giving the ref an earful about the kickoff proceedings and barking out plays. It was a hectic time on the Irish sideline as both coordinators were new to this game and were sending in the wrong plays at the wrong time. In the confusion Michigan fumbled the ball away and then Notre Dame fumbled the ball right back on 2nd down and gave Michigan excellent field position.

Notre Dame's performance did not improve. They gave up a 56-yard touchdown run, threw a pick-6, gave up a field goal, turned the ball over on downs leading to another Michigan field goal. It was not a happy first quarter for the Irish. Things seemed to be looking up when Notre Dame intercepted the ball with just under 5 minutes left in the 2nd quarter. However things suddenly took an odd turn.

Notre Dame's coach was heard telling players the following three phrases:

  • You are choosing a dvd for tonight
  • You went to Egypt
  • I are choosing a book for reading

Then, just as suddenly as The Big 88, Jackie Noffard disappeared.